TGIF Fridays are for creativity days. Promote your business like a multi-billion dollar a year company.

Gentle Thoughts for Today

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

When I’m feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor’s dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Trust Me!

Did you ever notice:
The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are ‘ XL.’

The sole purpose of a child’s middle name is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.

There’s always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don’t hurt.

Did you ever notice:
When you put the 2 words ‘The’ and ‘IRS’ together it spells ‘Theirs.’

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.
Today, it’s called golf.

Keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth..AMEN..!!

Today, it’s time to get your business discovered online.

The Wrong E-mail Address

This one is priceless..

Wrong email address.
A lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address!!!!

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules.

So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife.

However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband’s funeral.

He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack.

The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends.

After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.

The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I’ve Arrived Right On Time
Date: October 16, 2005

I know you’re surprised to hear from me.

They have computers and the Internet here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones.

I’ve just arrived and have been checked in.
I’ve seen that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
Looking forward to seeing you then!!!!
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. It sure is freaking hot down here!!!!

Johnny Carson & Jack Webb & The Clappers

Johnny Carson and Jack Webb provide a very funny story about a cleaning women named Clara Clifford who discovers Johnny Carson’s copper clappers were stolen from his closet by Claud Cooper, a kleptomaniac from Cleveland.

Is your website discovered online? Is it found in the search engine results pages for your keywords? Improve your Internet exposure for your business today.

To Be 6 Again

To Be 6 Again…

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife, looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she’d like to have for her Birthday.

‘I’d like to be six again’, she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was. Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.

He then took her to a McDonald’s where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M’s. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, ‘Well Dear, what was it like being six again??’

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. ‘I meant my dress size, you dumb ass!’

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he’s gonna get it wrong.


So, which way were you really thinking to begin with?

Are you thinking straight on your Internet marketing?

Beware of Smart Little People

You’ll know the feeling.

I was having trouble with my computer.
So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over.
Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, ‘So, what was wrong?
He replied, “It was an ID ten T error.”

I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, “An, ID ten T error? What’s that? In case I need to fix it again.”

Eric grinned…. “Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?”

“No,” I replied. “Write it down,” he said, “and I think you’ll figure it out.”

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

I used to like Eric………….

Tech Support

This is India. It is where you call when you have a technical problem with your computer.

Rest assured you will get US support here.

Card Magic Trick

Playing Cards Magic Trick

Fascinating sleight of hand card trick using only four cards. Amazing what illusions can be done with magic.

Are you hiding your website online with sleight of hand from the search engine robots? Would you like to see your website in the search engine results? Learn more about marketing today using all available online tools to promote your business and gain more sales.

Fridays Migrates to Cpanel

Birds Flying

Just Like The Birds Fly South For The Winter

Fridays has migrated itself to a new web hosting provider.

It wasn’t that we didn’t like our old webhosting provider, but we needed more options. The old provider was running Plesk and the new hosting provider is using CPanel and WHM for control. CPanel makes it much easier to perform certain tasks like single page redirects or add some pretty cool features through Fantastico De Luxe.

The Adventures of Cube Girl

Do you work in an office environment? Does the boss take advantage of you? Do you wish you could get even? Then CubeGirl is the answer for you.

Meet the CubeGirl Superhero

The defender of office rights and the champion of the cubicles.

There’s a new cape in town…her name is Cubegirl. Normal cubicle worker by day, and superhero when needed, she’s saving the world, one cubicle at a time.

Read more about the Adventures of CubeGirl

See all her CubeGirl office episodes.

Get your business found online with superhero Internet marketing and business solutions.

Bear Crossing The Bridge

Bear Crossing The BridgeA bear was walking across the “Rainbow Bridge” in Truckee California, on the I-80, California / Nevada State line, when two cars also crossed the bridge from both directions.

The bear was so scared, with no place to run, made a leap over the side of the bridge. The motorists stopped their cars in horror of what just happened and ran to the edge to see how badly the bear was injured. To their amazement, they saw that bear had somehow grasped the lower ledge of the bridge support as it fell and pulled itself back up.

The authorities were notified that night and after making an assessment, they decided there was nothing that could be done until the following morning. Authorities returned at daybreak to find the bear sleeping on the ledge of the bridge support. A large, construction style, safety net was hung under the bridge and the bear was shot with a tranquilizing dart; then safely lowered to the ground below.

The first line sounds like the opening of a bad joke but here are the pictures…

…And this is how the bear crossed the bridge!

To learn the bare facts about Internet marketing visit Professional Web Services today. Be sure to ask for your free website marketing evaluation.

English Speaking Taxi Driver DR

Welcome to Fridays

About Jim

According to Jim

Home Location: San Ramon, California, United States

About Jim: TGIF Fridays are a day for some creativity. Don't get hung up on the small stuff. Promote your business like a multi-billion dollar a year company. Find out more today, with Professional Web Services, Inc., your online marketing specialist for B2B and B2C businesses.

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